Sponsored by
Proud... but not pushy
PUSHY mothers. They're a dangerous breed.
I am pretty sure I am not one, due in part to the fact that my own mum has never been one and I reckon you do look at your own parents as examples of good role models when becoming a parent yourself.
Now, proud mums. Well, that's a different story. There's absolutely nothing wrong with being one those.
According to new research, however, it's not just a case of being a pushy mother – and they do exist – it's a case of which of your children (if you happen to have more than one) are you the pushiest with?
The eldest, apparently. The firstborn.
More than a third of mums said they thought their first child would be the most academically successful – almost 10,000 mums were canvassed for their opinions.
This was the child they expected to succeed in school, compared with their younger siblings.
Only 6 per cent thought it would be the middle child who would be the most studious, while 15 per cent believed it would be the baby of the family who turned out to be the cleverest.
You may have thought that being the eldest had its perks but there are obviously a number of drawbacks – all that pressure to succeed academically for one.
What does make disturbing reading is that, the same mums, when asked which child they thought would be the happiest in life, only a handful (7 per cent, to be exact) believed it would be the eldest.
Not only that, but almost half (45 per cent) admitted that inflicting their pushy parenting on the firstborn could result in making their child more likely to suffer from depression or anxiety.
And the reason for their greater expectations from their first child? Because mums identified with their eldest more than their other offspring.
This news story caught my eye because only minutes earlier I had taken a euphoric phone call from my firstborn to say she had been awarded a first-class degree. I could hardly speak due to a mixture of pride and choked emotion, I have to admit.
The result is all down to her hard work and dedication, sheer relentless graft. And that has always been of her own volition.
I would hope she would agree she has always been supported, but never pushed.
If that sounds as though I am making myself out to be the world's most perfect parent, then let me tell you I am not. Who is?
Of course you have hopes and dreams for your children. What parent doesn't? It's a tough old world out there and more than ever, young people these days need to be prepared.
But isn't it just enough to encourage and support your children so that they do their best without insisting that grade As are the be all and end all? A happy child surely is the best result.
Email to a friend
Print this page- A58 crash UPDATE: road now re-open after man hit by car earlier this morning
- Crash on the A58 in Halifax this morning UPDATE: Man in hospital with several broken bones
- Taxi worker dies aged 35 after finishing his shift
- Man suffers serious injuries in accident on M62
- How the new Halifax Central Library will look
Looking for...
Featured advertisers
Jobs
Search for a job
Motors
Search for a car
Property
Search for a house
Weather for Halifax
Saturday 11 February 2012
Today
Cloudy
Temperature: -2 C to 0 C
Wind Speed: 8 mph
Wind direction: South west
Tomorrow
Cloudy
Temperature: 2 C to 5 C
Wind Speed: 9 mph
Wind direction: North west
