Mothers' Union: A prevailing goal to eradicate domestic abuse.

By Julia Tum, Mothers’ Union branch leader, St John the Divine, Rastrick:

A TV programme entitled “Her Majesty the Queen: Behind closed doors.” explored the prevalence of domestic abuse, the laws which have been passed over the years to stop it, and that it can happen to anyone.

Abuse often generates in the victim a great feeling of shame, an unwillingness to accept that this is really happening, perhaps it is their own fault, and since it may not be discussed openly, perhaps this is normal. Queen Camilla has been actively involved in efforts to highlight domestic violence against women since 2010. The lives of many victims including celebrity Sir Patrick Stewart, shared their own poignant experiences.

There is much more that we can be aware of and we need to understand how to support those who suffer from domestic abuse and how it decimates families.

Did you know that in 1895 a law was passed that forbade men to hit their wives between the hours of 10pm and 7am since the noise generated would disturb neighbours as they slept?

Did you know that as recent as December 2015 a law was passed giving a clearer definition of coercive control?

Did you know that it was only in 1991 that it became illegal for a man to rape his wife.

Sadly, though no matter how many laws are passed it doesn’t change behaviour. Apparently 800,000 women across England and Wales suffer sexual assault. The programme told us that there is a domestic abuse call every 30 secs on the emergency numbers, and that 25 per cent of girls aged between 13-17 experience physical force in a relationship.

What can we do as Mothers Union Members? What can we do as members of a civilised society?

We can provide welcome bags of toiletries for the agencies who run the Refuges. We can provide washing up bowls in which we can place household items for the women for when they leave the Refuge and start up again in their own premises. We can believe someone who tells us their story of violence. Woman’s Aid are engaged in amazing work and PDAP, an agency in Huddersfield, looks after a number of Refuges. They have put out a special Christmas appeal. One telling phrase in that appeal is “This Christmas, you have a unique opportunity to extend your circle of care and bring that sense of family to the families in our care, including 50 little boys and girls in refuge and in our outreach services. Your kindness can provide more than just shelter – it can create a loving family for survivors of domestic abuse during the festive season and a bring a smile to a child’s face.”

Above all we can pray as to what we can do to eradicate this abusive behaviour. As Queen Camila has stepped up so can we! One of the aims of the MU is to promote conditions in society favourable to a stable family life and for the protection of children. We put up posters around the town with emergency numbers victims can call when in difficulty. Let’s put up more! Let’s support all the victims!