Halifax Fire Station welcomes West Yorkshire's first non-binary firefighter as they explain why pronouns are important

Tay Stevenson says colleagues in Halifax have embraced their status and worked hard to help them settle in.

As part of International Day against Homophobia, Transphobia and Biphobia, Tay wants to help people understand why getting pronouns right is important.

Tay, 37, said: “While growing up I always felt like I didn’t fit into the stereotypical male gender. Mentally it just doesn’t match who I am but neither did the female.

“I put this intrinsic feeling of not matching to one side and I got on with life.

“Then I met my partner and we fell in love – she was the first person who really accepted me because she was the only one I had talked to about how I felt regarding my disconnection to male/female genders.

“We didn’t fully understand what I was but we loved each other and were very happy.”

Tay said it was filling out an application form for a job that made them discover the term ‘non-binary’.

“A bit of research into the term and I realised that “non-binary” is exactly what I am - what I always have been,” Tay said. “And that I wasn’t wrong, it wasn’t that I didn’t fit, but the male and female terms didn’t fit me.

“This was so important to me and such a relief. This constant unease of not fitting with the gender I was assigned at birth, but not wanting to transition, was finally addressed within myself.

“I find it lovely when people use my preferred pronouns of ‘they’ and ‘them’, however I typically don't share my pronouns immediately upon meeting someone for the first time, or unless they ask.

"I think this is because I don't want to put people on the back foot, and I like to tell them in my own time.

“On the fire-ground I am just a firefighter and pronouns at that point are not a priority for me, at least until after the incident has been managed.

“However, what "they" and "them" mean to me is that the person using those pronouns are doing their best to recognise me for who I am.”